100+ Funny and Witty Replies to Are You Single?

How to Respond to Sarcastic Attacks at Work

100+ Funny and Witty Replies to Are You Single?

“Nice of you to finally join us!” “Yeah, that’s ever going to happen.” “Sure. We can set a deadline. We’re great at meeting deadlines!” What do you do when these things are said at the office?

Sarcasm is a fundamental and important part of our culture. But before we can talk about when and why people say these words, let’s be clear on what it means to be sarcastic. Merriam-Webster has a great definition:

sarcasm (n) – the use of words that mean the opposite of what you really want to say especially in order to insult someone, to show irritation, or to be funny

You can’t always see sarcasm at work, although there is a punctuation mark intended for this purpose. However, you can hear it in the way people speak. Here are a few common examples:

  • I can’t wait to go to the dentist and get my teeth drilled!
  • I just love paying taxes!
  • I can’t stand it when people are nice to me!

© Flickr user gabrielsaldana

The purpose of sarcasm is to allow us to talk about something that we feel is unacceptable without being direct. If we’re being flippant about our own feelings, (e.g. “I’d be happy to pay for the repairs even though they aren’t my fault”) we mean that we feel the opposite way (i.e. “I do not feel that I should pay for the repairs, because I am not at fault.”)

Sarcasm gets bad at the office, because it’s usually about other people or institutions. We make fun of customers, vendors, partners, or the company as a whole. Here are some more examples, along with their implication (one of our favorite workplace communication exposition techniques):

  • “It must be nice to get to go on vacation.” (You don’t work as hard as me.)
  • “I wish I got the easy projects.” (You are an office favorite and I’m a pariah.)
  • “If I only had children, I’d get more sick days too!” (You use your kids as an excuse to be lazy.)

These are all pretty terrible. So what should you do when someone drops a sarcasm bomb in the office?

© Flickr user Robbie Grubbs

If you ignore it, that won’t do anything. If you respond with your own witty comment, you help reinforce the idea that it is acceptable. Therefore, the best response to sarcasm is to acknowledge it as evidence of frustration.

“It sounds you have a concern. Can we talk about that? I want to do the best work possible, so if you have a concern I want to hear it so we can work through it. Can we talk about your concern?”

It’s true that some people won’t want to engage. But if that’s the case, you can ask them why they brought it up in the first place. You can even repeat their words back to them.

“Wait—I just heard you ‘thanks for deciding to grace us with your presence.’ What inspired you to say that?”

This can be a little awkward. Return to the emotion that is lying underneath, not the one that is stated aloud.

“It’s okay if you’re frustrated. But if a change needs to be made, we have to talk about it directly. Are you willing to share?”

Sarcasm can undermine morale at the workplace. Try not to engage in it yourself. And if other people use this technique, stop them by asking them why they are doing it.

Remember: the words you choose do make a difference.

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Source: https://www.accelawork.com/respond-sarcastic-attacks-work/

33 Easy Speaking Hacks to Make You Sound Smarter

100+ Funny and Witty Replies to Are You Single?

The next best thing to being an intelligent person is having people think you’re intelligent. Of course there are things you can do to become brainier; going to college springs to mind.

But let’s face it, these methods take a long time, and they’re no help for you trying to impress that girl or guy at that party you’re at right now. Don’t drop school, but these speaking hacks will help you come across as being smarter than the average bear.

Just please don’t be that guy who uses them all in one night.

  1. Memorize a fact and drop it into a conversation

    Since all you’re trying to do is sound smarter, before you head to a cocktail party memorize a little-known fact, Princes Charles and William will never travel on the same plane so that in the event of a crash, at least one will survive to protect the throne.

  2. Shyness is pride

    Even if you’re brilliant, you won’t sound that way if you present your case weakly. Don’t worry about what people are thinking about you and focus on making your point forcefully.

  3. Steer the conversation

    Instead of trying to fake your way through a conversation on a topic you’re clueless about, subtly direct it into an area more up your alley and go to town.

  4. Nail down “who” and “whom”

    It’s always funny when someone clearly trying to sound more intelligent misuses “whom.” Here’s the way to tell: just answer the question. Who did it? He did. Whom should I thank? Thank him.

  5. Memorize pi

    Have this one ready to go when someone says the word “pie.” Learn it to a max of 50 places; it’s long enough that no one will upstage you.

  6. Fake a British accent

    I say, our friends across the pond sound ever so much smarter than us Yanks. Obviously the goal here is British scientist, not Russell Brand.

  7. Cut out crutch words

    It’s tough to sound smart when you say “” and “um” every few seconds. Train yourself not to resort to these crutch words.

  8. Don’t commit

    If you never speak, you won’t sound dumb but you sure won’t sound any smarter. Instead, hedge. Say “I’m waiting for more conclusive evidence” when pressed for your opinion.

  9. Beat around the bush

    When you’re talking business, hedging is also known as using jargon. With a crowd of people who aren’t in your industry, use all those acronyms and industry-speak that a colleague would get but will mystify the uninitiated.

  10. Criticize intangibles

    This was designed for a work environment but it applies anywhere. An easy way to sound superior is to dog other people on unquantifiable traits motivational skills or how much they’re a team player.

  11. Fabricate statistics

    No one is really going to check that crazy figure you made up to back up your interesting story. If they do, just say you mixed up the magazine you got it from. Was it GQ? Or maybe it was Men’s Journal?

  1. Don’t mention your source

    Even if it’s completely true, you won’t sound very smart saying you got that fact you just shared from watching “Family Guy.” You don’t have to lie, just say you “heard that somewhere.”

  2. Use sound bites

    You don’t have to read the Wall Street Journal cover to cover every day to sound smart. Scan a few headlines from different sections before heading out the door and pretend you’re totally up-to-speed.

  3. Speak to two people

    Everyone agrees that if you can speak to two people well, you can do the same with 200 people. The trick here to boost your confidence and sound smarter is to find two agreeable faces in that audience of 200 and speak only to them.

  4. Learn a couple foreign language phrases

    The key to this hack is memorizing a few phrases in a foreign tongue. Go as obscure as possible to lower your odds of coming across an actual speaker of that language who’ll try to engage you in conversation.

  5. Read Amazon book reviews

    Who’s got the time to read a whole book? Use Amazon’s user-generated book reviews for inside information that makes it sound you read what you haven’t.

  6. Ask questions

    With a little bit of information you can pose questions to someone else and then call them out if their answer is wrong, instantly making you look a god among mortals.

  7. Tell people you only read The Economist

    This will a) impress people who always mean to read The Economist but end up reading People … and b) imply that you’ve tried every other possible news magazine and they all fell short of your high standards.

  8. You say it best …

    …when you say nothing at all. Tacking on a phrase “It is what it is” to the end of a conversation just makes you sound less intelligent.

  9. Get in the last word

    On the other hand, there is something to be said for getting the final say. Simply repackage what others have said and put it out there with a tone that says, “and now the subject is put to bed.”

  10. Cheat

    Alex Trebek has been sounding smarter than contestants for years, but as Sean Connery revealed, the guy reads from a card! Use your smartphone to surreptitiously pull up a pertinent fact to contribute to a conversation.

  11. Name drop

    Let a famous thinker or writer give your argument weight and make you sound you know what you’re talking about. Our personal favorite: Noam Chomsky.

  1. Say “I prefer their early stuff”

    Someone discussing a band you aren’t familiar with? Use this line to appear more discerning, but use with caution: the line between cool and tool here is very thin.

  2. Gesture

    Gesturing while speaking actually might make you smarter by helping you have better recall. Even if it doesn’t, people’s attention will be divided between your words and watching your hands and they might miss you saying something incorrect.

  3. Talk the loudest

    Probably because it conveys confidence, if you talk the loudest, the people around you will assume you are an authority on the subject.

  4. Speak slowly

    Is Jeff Goldblum smart? Just by watching his movies we have no way to prove or disprove that he is. But he comes off some kind of cool scientist in interviews just by taking his time to say things.

  5. Master the mic

    If you are giving a miked-up presentation, you’ll look an idiot if you’re holding it too close to your face or a speaker. Take a few minutes to practice the right way to use it.

  6. Remember a few quotes

    Winston Churchill said, “It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations. The quotations, when engraved upon the memory, give you good thoughts.” See what we did there?

  7. His or her

    It’s PC to say “their” when referring to one person, but it’s not really correct. It sounds smarter to say, “The owner of this sandwich should know his or her lunch is about to be eaten.”

  8. Don’t overshoot

    Know your limits. If you aren’t 100% sure you’ve got a grasp of that $10 word, go with something you know.

  9. Master the metaphor

    Sometimes when you have nothing relevant to contribute, your best option is to say something right left field, leave, and let your audience assume what you said must be brilliant because it couldn’t possibly be that moronic. Try, “A single Russian hair outweighs half a Pole.”

  10. Answer questions with questions

    Teachers do this to encourage students to find their own answers. You can do this when you have no clue what the answer is.

  11. Make up words

    Most people have limited vocabularies. You’ll have to assess your audience to see if you can get away with this, but if you sprinkle in a legitimate-sounding word of your own design, people will simply assume you know a word they don’t.

Source: https://www.bestcollegesonline.com/blog/33-easy-speaking-hacks-to-make-you-sound-smarter/

100+ Tongue Twisters for Family Fun

100+ Funny and Witty Replies to Are You Single?

We had so much fun putting our riddles for kids post together. I am always pulling the riddles out randomly to challenge the kids. They love it!  But our latest fascination is tongue twisters for kids.

Tongue Twisters have been around for many many years and are such a fun way to try to challenge yourself and your kids to say them to see if you can. It is not always about the speed of the tongue twister but how clearly you can say it too. 

Tongue twisters are often similar words which follow one another but differ in certain syllables. 

Once your kids learn some tongue twisters you will see them excited to go to school or visit a relative and show off their ability to do tongue twisters. 

Be sure to check out how to turn tongue twisters into a fun family game at the bottom of this post!

Tongue twisters aren’t only great and fun to say. They also are a great way to help kids with diction.

People have been making tongue twisters for ages and mainly do it for amusement but many people use them for articulation exercises such as radio hosts and politicians to help with their professional speaking! So if your child has a dream to become an actor, television host, or even a radio DJ host tongue twisters are a great way for them to practice and be prepared for when their big break comes. 

Think your family would a little tongue curling challenge? Ready to make your children laugh? You will find that your children will find the funniest part of tongue twisters are the silly mistakes they make while trying to master these tongue twisters. 

Try one of these 100+ tongue twisters for kids! 

100+ Tongue Twisters for Kids

We’ve tried to categorize these, but truthfully… They’re all pretty funny and not-so-easy!

Below you’ll find some of our favorite hard tongue twisters, funny tongue twisters and short tongue twisters for kids.

If you’re playing with a very young child, you might want to jump to the shorter tongue twisters… Simply because it will be hard for the younger ones with shorter attention spans to “stay with you” on longer sentences!

30+ Hard Tongue Twisters

  1. Any noise annoys an oyster but a noisy noise annoys an oyster more.
  2. If a black bug bleeds black blood, what color blood does a blue bug bleed?
  3. If two witches were watching two watches: which witch would watch which watch?
  4. Rory’s lawn rake rarely rakes really right.
  5. She sold six shabby sheared sheep on ship.
  6. Mix a box of mixed biscuits with a boxed biscuit mixer.
  7. If you notice this notice, you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing
  8. The bottom of the butter bucket is the buttered bucket bottom.
  9. Vincent vowed vengeance very vehemently.
  10. Does your sport shop stock short socks with spots?
  11. Many mumbling mice are making merry music in the moonlight.
  12. The boot black brought the black boot back.
  13. Super-duper storm troopers whoop it up at Death Star groupers: helmet thrashing, rebel bashing, laser blasting at party poopers.
  14. No need to light a night-light on a light night tonight.
  15. Shave a single shingle thin.
  16. I saw Susie sitting in a shoe shine shop.
  17. A big black bug bit a big black bear made the big black bear bleed blood.
  18. I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit.

    Upon the slitted sheet I sit

  19. The sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick.
  20. Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager managing an imaginary menagerie.
  21. Kindly kittens knitting mittens keep kazooing in the king’s kitchen.

  22. Brisk brave brigadiers brandished broad bright blades, blunderbusses, and bludgeons balancing them badly
  23. Rory the warrior and Roger the worrier were reared wrongly in a rural brewery
  24. A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.
  25. Lesser leather never weathered wetter weather better.
  26. She saw Sharif’s shoes on the sofa. But was she so sure those were Sharif’s shoes she saw?
  27. To begin to toboggan first buy a toboggan, but don’t buy too big a toboggan. Too big a toboggan is too big a toboggan to buy to begin to toboggan.
  28. Hassock hassock, black spotted hassock. Black spot on a black back of a black spotted hassock.

  29. On a lazy laser raiser lies a laser ray eraser.
  30. Did Dick Pickens prick his pinkie pickling cheap cling peaches in an inch of Pinch or framing his famed French finch photos?
  31. Betty bought butter but the butter was bitter, so Betty bought better butter to make the bitter butter better.

30 Funny Tongue Twisters

  1. I saw a saw that could out saw any other saw I ever saw.
  2. A big bug bit the little beetle but the little beetle bit the big bug back.
  3. A sailor went to sea To see, what he could see. And all he could see Was sea, sea, sea.

  4. How much wood could a wood chuck; chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood
  5. Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, FuzzyWuzzy wasn’t very fuzzy… was he???
  6. I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream
  7. Toy boat. Toy boat. Toy boat.
  8. Twelve twins twirled twelve twigs.

  9. Five frantic frogs fled from fifty fierce fishes.
  10. A synonym for cinnamon is a cinnamon synonym.
  11. The great Greek grape growers grow great Greek grapes
  12. Six socks sit in a sink, soaking in soap suds
  13. I saw a kitten eating chicken in the kitchen.

  14. Six sick hicks nick six slick bricks with picks and sticks.
  15. Background background, black, black, brown, brown.

  16. If a dog chews shoes, whose shoes does he choose?
  17. How many yaks could a yak pack, pack if a yak pack could pack yaks?
  18. Can you can a can as a canner can can a can?
  19. A big bug bit the little beetle but the little beetle bit the big bug back.
  20. Double bubble gum, bubbles double.

  21. Linda-Lou Lambert Loves Lemon Lollipop Lipgloss
  22. Near an ear, a nearer ear, a nearly eerie ear
  23. Susie works in a shoeshine shop. Where she shines she sits, and where she sits she shines
  24. Thirty-three thirsty, thundering thoroughbreds thumped Mr. Thurber on Thursday.
  25. Fresh French fried fly fritters
  26. Gobbling gorgoyles gobbled gobbling goblins.
  27. Many an anemone sees an enemy anemone.
  28. A shapeless sash sags slowly.
  29. Smelly shoes and socks shock sisters.
  30. I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won’t wish the wish you wish to wish.

43+ Short Tongue Twisters (for the younger kiddos)

The whole family can get a laugh tongue twisters, right?

But sometimes the littlest ones need something a bit easier.

Their attention span isn’t as developed, and they’ll get lost in the lengthier ones.  So we compiled a list just for them!

Even your 2-3 year old children will love getting their tongues tied on these!

  1. Daddy Draws Doors
  2. Round and round the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran
  3. Six slippery snails, slid slowly seaward.
  4. Crisp crusts crackle and crunch.
  5. Round the rugged rocks the ragged rascals ran.
  6. Susie sits shinning silver shoes
  7. Which wrist watches are Swiss wrist watches?
  8. Fred fed Ted bread and Ted fed Fred bread
  9. Four furious friends fought for the phone
  10. The cat catchers can’t catch caught cats.
  11. Three fluffy feathers fell from Phoebe’s flimsy fan.
  12. She should shun the shinning sun.
  13. Cooks cook cupcakes quickly.
  14. Betty and Bob brought back blue balloons from the big bazaar.
  15. Little Lillian lets lazy lizards lie along the lily pads
  16. Each Easter Eddie eats eighty Easter eggs.
  17. Green glass globes glow greenly .
  18. Clean clams crammed in clean cans
  19. slimey snake slithered down the sandy Sahara.
  20. She sees cheese.
  21. Bake big batches of bitter brown bread.
  22. Which witch is which?
  23. Elizabeth has eleven elves in her elm tree.
  24. Red Lorry, yellow lorry
  25. A proper copper coffee pot.
  26. Six sticky skeletons.
  27. Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.
  28. How can a clam cram in a clean cream can?
  29. Freshly fried fresh flesh.
  30. A noisy noise annoys an oyster.
  31. Betty’s big bunny bobbled by the blueberry bush
  32. Drew Dodd’s dad’s dog’s dead.
  33. Seventy-seven benevolent elephants
  34. Willie’s really weary
  35. Wayne went to wales to watch walruses
  36. Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely
  37. Six slimy snails sailed silently.
  38. Octopus ocular optics.
  39. Send toast to ten tense stout saints’ ten tall tents.
  40. Roberta ran rings around the Roman ruins.
  41. A bragging baker baked black bread.
  42. Shave a single shingle thin.
  43. Dick kicks sticky bricks.

Fun Tongue Twisters from Dr. Seuss

We love the tongue twisters above, but we all know no one compares with the original bard of twisting kids’ tongues: Dr. Seuss.

That’s why one of our favorite Dr. Seuss books is Oh Say Can You Say?

Of course, this book is more than just a set of tongue twisters… It’s a lively classic that kids still love today.

The book is illustrated with all the whimsy of a Dr. Seuss story, and loaded with rhymes and sentences we know you can’t say three times fast.

If this isn’t already part of your collection, it needs to be. Click here to snag Oh Say Can You Say?

Benefits of Tongue Twisters

Tongue Twisters can be difficult but such a great fun way to improve a child’s memory and reading skills. Children who practice tongue twisters can improve their English and better their knowledge of rhyming words and you will find that they learn to appreciate sounds. 

Tongue twisters have so many benefits for young children especially when it comes to speech and language. Doing tongue twisters can help exercise their muscles that help lead to clearer pronunciation and gives them the ability to speak clearly.

 Tongue twisters can also help a child recognize what words are difficult for them to pronounce. Try a few of these tongue twisters and you may even notice yourself a word that is difficult for your child to pronounce.

When a child knows a certain word is hard to say they can then focus individually on a certain word to master it.

Once they master a hard word they can then be more successful at tongue twisters because it will not slow them down. 

Another benefit you will notice of Tongue twisters is increasing your child’s vocabulary. Use these tongue twisters to talk about words they may not know the meaning to just yet. As you introduce new tongue twisters you will find that you are increasing their vocabulary. 

Turning Tongue Twisters Into a Game with Your Kids

You can, of course, just run through the list above but why not make a game of it? Here’s how to play the game:

Print the page, cut out each twister line and put them loosely in a bag.

Go around the table and get each person to pull one tongue twister the bag for their challenge.

Depending on the age range of those playing or the difficulty of the twister, you can create mini-challenges:

  • See how quickly someone can say their challenge correctly.
  • Try saying the twister over and over and count the number times it’s said before the user messes it up.
  • Say the twister with a straight face, no laughing (this is harder than you think.
  • Play broken telephone, repeating the twister quietly to the person next to you and see what turns out in the end.

Now that you and your kids have been challenging each other at tongue twisters if you have an Alexa you can now send the kids to play with your Alexa. Just go to your Alexa, and say Alexa, open tongue twisters. Make sure you have enabled it on your app first and see how well they do!  

You could also try your hand at making your own tongue twisters for kids. Do you have a favorite tongue twister that’s not on this list? Share it in the comments! 

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Source: https://www.everythingmom.com/activities/50-tongue-twisters-for-family-fun

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